Looking Up

Things are looking up a bit since my last post..at least so far this week. Lauran seems to be back to her better self this week. I still have no answers back from the nurse yet, however next week is her appt at the child development center and I am eager to get that going. They will be assessing all aspect of her development.

I have been working on a boat load of questions and paperwork that they gave me in preparation for the appt. In going through some of the questions, I have had a big reminder of all that Lauran has gone through in her short life.

Sometimes, I admit, I do forget in away. In so many ways it seems like she has always been with us. Her adoption seems like it was light years ago. So much has gone on since then that I sometimes forget to reflect back on the reality of her past.

So far in her 4 years she has had 3 different homes, 2 sets of parents, and numerous caregivers in the orphanage.

 

Lauran has lived with us less time than she lived with her birth parents.

The time she lived in the orphanage is only now about the same number of months she has lived here.

Then there is the new country, new language, new siblings, leaving friends, and all the medical things she has had to endure in the midst of all those changes. 

It has not been an easy journey and is a learning process for all of us. God called us to adopt Lauran and even though sometimes I don't always know or understand the scope of what is going on with her, I know He does!  It has taken a lot of digging deep with God this past year to really come to a place to say that I completely trust Him with Lauran. Some days He has to remind me...but He has brought me a long way!

Sometimes God calls us to incredibly hard circumstances and following Him sometimes requires a lot of sacrifice. But in the process I am learning how to completely depend on Him and to see the beauty he is creating in the ashes of Lauran's past. In remembering all she has gone through I can't help but to see all that she has already overcome. I am witnessing Gods transforming power in Lauran's life in so many ways. It is amazing. It is when I start looking at my circumstances and I stop looking up, to the Creator of the universe, who has fearfully and wonderfully made Lauran and can count the hairs on her head, that I start to think I can't handle the difficulties.

Life is a journey about Him and the journey of adoption has taught me more about what that means.

 Isaiah 61:3

to bestow on them a crown of beauty

instead of ashes,

the oil of gladness

instead of mourning,

and a garment of praise

instead of a spirit of despair.

They will be called oaks of righteousness,

a planting of the LORD

for the display of his splendor.